


Support Group

by LizardOnIce27



Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-18
Updated: 2014-08-23
Packaged: 2018-02-13 16:33:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2157546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LizardOnIce27/pseuds/LizardOnIce27
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Patrick tries to kill himself, Andy moves into his apartment and forces him to see a therapist, and join a support group, where he meets Pete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Mentions of Suicide.  
> A bit of sarcastic dark humor?

Apparently there are more alternatives to trying to kill yourself than just failing or dying. Failing means that it either goes unnoticed, you get thrown into a psych ward, or your friend that found you promised not to tell anyone, as long as you get some kind of help. Andy helped me look into therapists, and in the end picked one for me because I wasn’t exactly cooperative. Dr. Connelly is alright, for a guy getting paid to judge me, but he’s also the reason Andy moved into my apartment. He didn’t think leaving me alone was wise, and because of that I haven’t been alone long enough to touch myself, let alone kill myself. Andy’s great, he is, and he means well. But he’s driving me crazy. Tonight, instead of watching yet another Harry Potter weekend on ABC Family(For no apparent reason again, but I’m not complaining.), Andy is dragging me along to a support group for people who tried to accelerate their expiration date, and people who have lost loved ones to suicide. It’s going to be a whiny sob fest and I want absolutely nothing to do with it. But, here I am in Andy’s car. 

“You know what we could do instead?”

Andy sighs, “Patrick, you’re going.”

“But, instead we could go see a movie, ride bikes in Walmart, go bowling, or anything in the world aside from focusing on the fact that I tried to kill myself.”

“It’s hard to think of anything else.” he snaps.

I groan, “I know, okay? And I get that. I fucked up, you’re worried. I totally get it but this isn’t working. It’s only stressing us both out more. So why don’t we just, take a night off, forget about it, and just have fun. Please?”

He bites his lip, “Tomorrow, maybe. But you… you need this.”

I roll my eyes and kick the dash, “No I don’t! I tried killing myself, I don’t really have much room for a bunch of strangers’ problems!”

He stops at a redlight and turns to glare at me, “You need to see what it’s like for the people who get left behind! People who blame themselves even though they never saw it coming! You’re going if I have to drag you while you kick and scream.”

I wince and nod, “Alright, alright...I’ll try to complain less.”

He rolls his eyes and steps on the gas when the light changes. The next few minutes are filled with an uncomfortable silence, the fog of tension is thick enough to make me suffocate. I’m almost glad when he parks, and I can get out of his car.

 

We walk into the coffee shop that’s opened an hour later than most nights, for the support group. It’s too bad it’s not a liquor store. Andy leads me over to the group cluttered together on one side of the shop, spread among several two to four person tables. He sits down at an empty two person table, so I sit in front of him, glad we won’t have to share with anyone. I glance around as everyone talks in quiet murmurs to whomever they came with. I stop looking around once a guy sitting alone, sipping coffee catches my eye. His hair is either a really dark brown, or black, and he has his feet propped up in the other chair to avoid company. His sleeves are rolled up, exposing several tattoos on each arm. But what caught my attention first, were his eyes. They’re brown and, if I’m honest with myself, beautiful, but they’re also sad and empty. Impulsively, I stand up.

“Patrick you aren’t leaving.” Andy grabs my arm.

“I know, I’m not. Just, be right back.” I pull my arm away and walk over to him, “Um… hello.”

The guy looks up and raises an eyebrow, “Seat’s taken.”

I bite my lip and nod, “I, yeah I can see that. But if… if you’d like to sit with my friend and I, you could bring the other chair over too.”

He rolls his eyes, “Look kid, I appreciate it-”

“I’m not a kid, and if it’s a no just say so. No need to sugarcoat it.” I fold my arms across my chest.

He tilts his head, “Fine then, no.”

“Fine. I hope you and your shoes have a lovely conversation.” I snap before walking to the counter to get Andy and I coffee. Why did I even bother? I don’t know the guy, who cares if he’s lonely? I groan impatiently as the barista has to dumb down the various coffee drinks for the older lady in the front. She finally chooses and the line moves up. I glance over at the guy, noticing him quickly look away. That’s it, he’s going to sit with us if I have to drag him over. And now I’m turning into Andy. I move up and order coffee for Andy and I, then nods towards Pete.

“Any chance you remember what he got?” I ask.

The barista nods, “He’s here a lot, I know his by heart.”

I nod, “Okay, one of those too.”

He raises an eyebrow, “Didn’t you just snap, kinda loudly, at Pete?”

“Pete? Yeah I, I feel bad so it’s my way of apologizing.” I shrug, only half lying.

The guy nods and swipes my card before making the drinks. He hands them to me, and I take Andy’s drink, and mine, to our table before slamming Pete’s down on his.

“You are now officially in my debt, to repay me, you can come sit with us.” I say as he looks up at me in confusion.

He snorts and shakes his head, “Normally I’d open the coffee and splash you with it, but since I was really dreading that line…” He stands up, “Lead the way.” 

I walk over to our table and sit beside Andy. Pete puts the chair down in front of me and sits down.

Andy raises an eyebrow, “Friend of yours?”

“Oh yeah, see since we’re both here we thought, double suicide.” I say before letting it filter through my mind, “Sorry Andy, I’ll shut up.”

Andy frowns, but Pete has to cover his mouth to muffle his soft giggles.

“He was sitting alone, so I asked him to come join us.” I shrug a shoulder.

“Forced, not asked. Forced.” Pete says, “Oh, I’m Pete by the way.”

“I’m Patrick, and this is Andy.” I take a sip of my coffee, “Is this ever going to start so we can get it over with?”

Andy elbows me, “They’re waiting for everyone in line to get seated.”

I groan.

“First time?” Pete smirks.

“And last.” I mumble.

Andy sighs.

“It’s really not so bad. I thought I’d never come back, but after the first meeting I decided it might actually help. And it has a bit, but I listen more than I talk… I don’t like sharing my personal life.”

I nod, “Which is why I don’t want to be here. I screwed up, not everyone needs to know.”

Pete nods, “But talking about it really can help. Even listening to everyone else helps some though.”

Once everyone is seated, the older lady who had trouble picking a coffee stands up.

“Hello everyone.” She says in a soft voice, “I see two new faces here, so before we start, let’s let them introduce themselves.” she nods towards Andy and I.

Andy stands up and tugs at my arm to get me up. I stand reluctantly and try to hide behind Andy as much as possible.

“Could you tell us your names, and why you’re here?” she asks.

I groan, “Isn’t that kind of obvious?” Andy elbows me as Pete grins.

“Andy Hurley, and I’m here for a friend. Luckily I haven’t lost him yet.” he looks to me before sitting down.

I fidget and look down at my feet, “Patrick, tried to kill myself, didn’t work obviously.” I sit back down quickly.

She nods, “My name is Sheila and we’re all glad to have you both.”

She then begins going around the room and letting everyone share some of their feelings, experiences, etc. Most people share, but a few choose not to. Andy shares enough for the both of us, so I decide to keep my mouth shut.

“Pete, would you like to share today?” she asks.

He glances towards me before nodding, “Today I got my medication refilled and after this, I intended on taking them all. These meetings have helped some but my personal life is still a mess. I’ve isolated myself from my friends, family, and I haven’t spoken about anything here in almost two months. I was getting back to where I was before, not seeing the point of being alive. I’m depressed but I can manage it if I can see a reason to. Until tonight I haven’t. But New Guy refused to let me sit alone. So if some guy I’ve never met thinks I shouldn’t be alone, maybe he’s right. Maybe I just haven’t found what my purpose is yet. So for now, the plan is to stick around and find out. Unfortunately that’s subject to chance, but for now, thank you Patrick.” He gives me a small smile.

I blush and look down at my coffee, tuning out the rest of the meeting.

 

Once everyone starts to get up, I quickly run out to Andy’s car. Pete and Andy aren’t far behind.

“He’s totally not pissed.” I hear Pete mumble.

“Trust me, I’ve known him for years, he’s pissed.” Andy replies.

As they get closer, Pete asks, “Patrick, you’re not pissed off, right?”

I glare at him before looking to Andy, “Keys, car, drive, now.”

Pete frowns, “Why are you mad at me?”

“Because you _both_ decided to talk about me in a room full of strangers!” I snap and snatch Andy’s keys out of his hand, unlocking the passenger door.”

“Patrick that’s the point.” Andy frowns.

I slam the door shut.

Pete opens the back passenger side door and gets in, “I didn’t say anything bad, and it was mostly about me anyways.”

“Why are you in the car?” I ask, putting on my seat belt and handing the keys over once Andy gets in.

“I’m spending the night?” Pete pouts at me.

“Oh, oh in my apartment? You gonna move in too without permission?” I glare at Andy.

“Dr. Connelly said-”

“I don’t give a fuck!” I snap at Andy, “I love you like a brother, honestly I do, but I need my fucking personal space. You glare at me when I use dairy products, you criticize my cleaning, and you won’t even let me sleep alone! I can’t even-hmmmm.” I lean my head back against the headrest as Pete massages my shoulders.

“I do not glare at you when you consume animal prod-”

“Shhh…” Pete cuts him off and keeps massaging my shoulder, “He stopped, leave it alone.”

“But-”

“Leave it.” Pete massages the back of my neck.

I close my head and feel my shoulders relax, mumbling, “Still hate you both….but fuck you can spend the night.”

Pete chuckles softly and massages all the way to my apartment.

 

For the first time since Andy’s moved in, he’s sleeping in other bedroom and not in mine. Pete plans on sleeping on the couch but we’re lying in my bed, talking about everything and nothing. We switch from important things, like why killing ourselves has seemed ideal, to irrelevant things, such as favorite color, food, holiday. And despite the fact that I don’t know him very well, I like talking to him. Andy’s always trying to force more and more out of me, but Pete’s gladly taking what he can get, and giving just as much in return. Around three in the morning, most of our conversation consists of yawns.

“I should let you get some sleep.” Pete says, his voice a little rough from tiredness, as he gets up.

“No, hey.” I grab his arm and pull him back down, “You can have my bed, the couch isn’t that great and it wouldn’t be very nice of me to make you sleep on it.”

He smiles tiredly, “Why don’t we just share it then?”

I yawn softly and nod, “Okay.” I put my glasses on the nightstand, then snort, “So I hope you’re not like a serial axe murderer because I just let you in my apartment and I’ve known you for what? Like...seven hours?”

He grins, “Oh I’m definitely a serial axe murderer, but you kept me up so late I’m too tired to kill you. So you get to live, for tonight.”

I snort and close my eyes, burying my face into the pillow, “Night Pete.”

“Night Patrick.”

 

I slowly wake up, yawning and stretching, before hitting Pete in the head by accident as I stretch. He grunts, still half asleep.

“Sorry Pete.” I whisper before getting out of bed and going into the living room.

I look around the living room for Andy, slowly opening his bedroom door to see if he’s there. I shrug, deciding he’s probably gone out for a run. I rub my eyes and go into the kitchen, seeing a note on the front, held by magnets.

“Patrick,

Gone for the day, call me if you need me.”

“If he wasn’t straightedge I’d assume he was on something. He hasn’t left me alone for even an hour since-”

“Talking to yourself?” Pete’s sleepy voice makes me jump.

“I, yes. Good morning…” I glance at the clock, “Afternoon…”

He grins, “You know I thought at first you were definitely going to tell me to leave, but now I don’t think so.”

“Why’s that?” I cross my arms.

His grin widens, “Because I’m totally your friend now.”

I roll my eyes, “Fuck you, want some breakfast? We can eat it and not feel like we’re terrible while Andy eats tofu.”

“Fuck you too, and yes. Food is good.”

I snort and get everything from the fridge, “I’m stuck with you now, aren’t I?”

“Oh, definitely. You gave me coffee, now we have to get married.” 

“Hmm… Well I’m apparently in the middle of an emotional crisis, so raincheck?” I roll my eyes.

He grins, “I’ll hold you to it.”


	2. The Awkward Tale From High School Years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning, Pete and Patrick get even more acquainted with each other.

Pete helps me make breakfast, which is pretty great because I’m prone to burning...everything. He’s nudged me out of the way more than a few times, politely refraining from telling me that I’m just in the way.

“Hey, ‘Trick, breakfast is almost done, can you get plates and forks?” he scrapes the burnt egg into the trash can.

“Yes, I will get out of your way and let you cook because I suck.” I open the cabinet and get two plates.

Pete snorts, “I’m sorry but you kind of do. How have you survived this long without someone to cook for you?”

I shrug, “You get used to the taste of burnt food after a while.” I put the forks on the plates.

“That’s just sad.” he shakes his head, “Don’t worry though, you have me to feed you now.”

I roll my eyes, speaking in a flat voice, “My hero.” then, jokingly, I add, “Wait, you’re not moving in too are you?”

Pete grins, “I appreciate the invite, but I have my own place.” he hands me my plate before sitting at the table. 

I sit across from him and take a sip of my milk before putting the eggs and bacon between my two slices of toast and taking a bite of the sandwich I’ve made. I really have forgotten how amazing food that hasn’t been burnt is. I look up to Pete who’s nearly inhaling his food, as if he hasn’t eaten in days.

“I get the like, idea of how to do the heimlich but I’ve never put it into practice so you might want to slow down.” I say, only half joking.

He answers after swallowing the large bite, for which I am incredibly thankful, “Then you’ll just have to shove your hand down my throat.” egg yolk dribbles down Pete’s chin as he takes another huge bite of his eggs. 

I snort and hand him a napkin, “I’d rather not, you’d probably eat my hand too.”

He winks and wipes off his chin, “Depends on how you taste.”

Blood rushes to my cheeks as I take another bite and look down to avoid his eyes.

He chuckles and continues eating, “So, can I ask you something that’s like….way personal?”

I scrunch my nose, trying to pretend I don’t feel dread pooling at the pit of my stomach, “It’s a bit early for all that isn’t it?”

“Relax.” He takes a sip of his drink, “I’m not going where you think I am with this.”

“So, we’re not going to talk about how I tried to kill myself?” I eye him suspiciously.

“Nah, it really is too early for all that. But if and when you feel comfortable enough to talk to me about it, I’m here.”

“Noted.” I mumble, whimping my mouth with my napkin and going to put my plate into the sink, “Okay, so personal, but not that personal?”

He follows me and puts his plate in the sink, shrugging, “When I first met Andy, he seemed really protective of you, so I thought, oh they’re dating. But then I slept in your bed, and that kinda made me think otherwise. So...you two aren’t dating right?”

I blush lightly, “No, Andy and I are definitely not dating.”

“Hmm… but you’re blushing. Aww do you have a crush on him?” Pete waggles his eyebrows.

I roll my eyes, “No, I don’t.”

“Are you sure? Because you’re still blushing.” he grins.

“I’m blushing because no, I don’t have a crush on him, but I have eyes I can see that he’s attractive!” I go to the living room and plop onto the couch, turning on the tv.

He sits beside me, “You’re being very defensive, ‘Trick.” he teases.

I roll my eyes and flip through the channels, “I’ve slept with him, is that what you wanted to hear?”

His eyes widen, “I was honestly just trying to ask if you were gay without _asking_ but that confirms it, thanks.”

“No it doesn’t. All it confirms is that I’m attracted to guys. I could totally be bi.” I shrug and stop on Doctor Who.

“Yeah, but you totally aren’t.” he shrugs.

“I’ll have you know, I’ve had a girlfriend.” I reply stubbornly.

“In third grade? Because I hate to break it to you, kid, but elementary romances don’t really count.” He smirks.

“High school, actually. Though it doesn’t really count either because we broke up after she figured out why I avoided doing anything beyond kissing her.”

He snorts, “Oh god, I need details and everything.”

“Why should I tell you anything?” I cock an eyebrow at him.

“Because if you don’t I’ll tell Andy you told me, in great detail, about the two of you having sex.”

I glare at him, “Fine.” before telling him about Rachel, embarrassed to have to relive it.

 

**Rachel pecks my lips a few times before pulling back to pull off her shirt. As she gets it up just under her bra, I start pulling it back down. She smacks my hands away before getting the shirt off and reaching back to unclasp her bra. I grab her arms in a panic and pull them away.**

**She rolls her eyes, “Patrick, I told you, no one’s home, it’s fine.”**

**“I-I don’t think-Please put your shirt back on.” I blush deeply and look anywhere but at her chest.**

**She holds her hands up in surrender before getting off of my lap and putting the shirt back on, “There. You know, most guys don’t oppose to seeing a girl shirtless.”**

**“I um.. I just, I don’t want to pressure you-”**

**“Noble as that is, Patrick… I don’t think that’s really why you’re always dodging anything beyond kissing with me.” she gives me a sad smile.**

**“Wh-What do you mean?” I bite my lip and start fidgeting.**

**She takes my hands and says softly, “Patrick, I’ve noticed the way you look at other guys. I thought maybe you were bi, because we’re dating after all, but… Patrick are you gay?”**

**“N-No I-”**

**“It’s okay if you are.” She cuts me off, “I won’t judge, or tell anyone. But I’d like to know if there’s ever going to be more here. If not, I’d like to be friends.”**

**I bite my lip and nod, “Yeah I… I’m gay.”**

 

Pete laughs, “I don’t know if I feel worse for the poor girl practically begging you to touch her, or you for trying so hard.”

I hit his arm playfully, “Yeah I feel your sympathy, asshole.”

“Hey, at least she was really cool about you being gay.” he shrugs.

“She really was. She didn’t tell anyone and we still talk every now and then.” I cross my arms and look to him, “So what about you, huh?”

Pete grins, “What about me?”

I roll my eyes, “Are you gay? Have you slept with Andy? Did you almost bang a girl in high school?”

He snorts, “About half, not that I recall, and I successfully banged a few in high school.”

“So...bi?” I ask.

He nods, “Indeed so. Though lately I’ve been off sex.” he shrugs, “Haven’t wanted to get into a relationship, and drag someone down with me, and more people frown upon the whole _friends with benefits_ thing than you’d think. Everyone wants more. Which, I get that. But it’s too overwhelming sometimes. Like, when you’re struggling with not killing yourself, a boyfriend or girlfriend would just make it all more stressful. Whereas, a fuck buddy wouldn’t.” he shrugs.

I nod, “Yeah, I get that. Like, part of me really wants to fall in love and all that crap… but right now most of me just wants any warm body willing to have sex with me..” I blush lightly.

“Well, you’ve got Andy?” he shrugs.

“No I don’t.” I look over to him, “Andy’s got a boyfriend, and right now? He’d much rather lecture me about reasons I should stop wishing I was dead, than sleep with me.”

Pete bites his lip, “For two people who’ve known each other since last night, we know each other pretty well, right?”

I shrug, “I guess so? You probably know more embarrassing things about my life than even Andy does, by now.”

He nods, “Do you find me attractive?”

My eyes widen as I feel my cheeks warm up, “What?”

He shrugs a shoulder, “We’re both single… We both want sex that’s uncomplicated…” he shrugs both shoulders this time, “So, maybe we should…. I mean, why not?”

My heart beats hard and fast against my chest as I let my mind wrap around Pete’s suggestion. Do I find him attractive? He’s absolutely stunning. Not to mention the tattoos he’s covered in, a huge weakness of mine. So, why not? I have a reason somewhere. Oh. Friendship.

“I-I… but I-I kinda planned on, well keeping you as a friend and...i-if things get awkward..”

He grins and slides a hand up to cup my cheek, grinning wider as I instinctively lean into his hand, “It won’t get awkward. We’re on the same page. Just sex.”

I lick my lip, “I’m going to be honest, you’re making it hard to disagree.”

He leans closer, nearly touching my lips with his, “How about this, we give it a trail run, yeah? If afterwards one of us decides they don’t want to, then we won’t.”

“Th-That seems fair.” I move to close the gap between our lips as Pete’s hand slides to the back of my head and grips my hair, stopping me.

He grins at the soft moan that pours out of my lips, “Deal?”

“Y-Yes, deal. Fuck, will you just kiss me already you asshole?” I glare at him.

He chuckles, “If you insist.” he winks seconds before our lips finally touch.


End file.
